Waffles, Repairs, Safety

My turn to write on this old thing, hey? I’ve been working at this company for almost forty years now, and have only gotten to write on the blog a handful of times. It’s good fun, but I never know what to write. Maybe I should just talk about my day. It started out pretty … [Expand…]

Company Conditioning

When did we get a glass elevator at work? For that matter, when did we get a glass anything at work? I distinctly remember there being no glass in this mega corporation’s skyscraper. There aren’t even glasses in the kitchens, and anybody with poor eyesight is required to wear contacts. I distinctly remember being told … [Expand…]

Mysterious Button

Yay! My turn to write on the company blog. I’ve been looking forward to this day for ages. I was starting to think I wouldn’t get a chance. But today I noticed a button on the elevator I’d never seen before. It said “Floor X”, so naturally, I pressed the button immediately. I expected the … [Expand…]

The Stanley Comparable

Wow, I’ve never been given the opportunity to write on here before. I’ve been working with the company for almost a decade now, but I’d only ever heard stories about the famous blog. When my team leader came around to my little cubicle on floor 17C and said it was finally my turn, I almost … [Expand…]

Visiting Bentleigh

I feel like I have to write on this website more often than everyone else. What’s this, the third time this year? Maybe it’s only the second, but Rize has over five hundred employees. By the laws of probability, I should only have to write on the company blog once every year or two. We’re … [Expand…]

Guest Post: Archerak

It was actually really easy to book a spot on Australia’s Next Top Office. My audition didn’t go too well, but the judges changed their mind when I showed them my sphere of complete and utter destruction and how it could tear through matter like a wet paper bag. They had some concerns because they’d … [Expand…]

Rose Selling Blog

I love writing on the employee blog because I can smash out a post in half an hour, even though the allocated time is an hour and a half. I basically get an extra lunch break, which is awesome. Am I worried about being caught by posting this? Not really, since the only person who … [Expand…]

Great Rose Circus

The Great Roses War was the best thing that ever happened to my business. Once the mutated roses calmed down and stopped attacking people, I was able to herd a large group of them up. Now I’m training them to perform tricks so that the Grand Rose Circus can head on the road. It’s going … [Expand…]

What’s My Job?

Apparently it’s my turn to work on the company blog again since I got into work late today. I guess I’ll just give a summary of my day. I got up and had a shower, dressed and ate my breakfast. The last thing I do before leaving home every day is pack my suitcase of … [Expand…]

All Kitchens Now

So now it’s all kitchens here in Melbourne. I bet it’s because they’re opening that museum. Suddenly we all got a course correction in the middle of the morning, which was very irritating because they’d already sent us our work for the day. We were doing some work for a company that sells boogie boards, … [Expand…]