I’ll Take Some Luxury Accommodation, Thank You

Oh yes. Now I could get used to working for a client that does luxury accommodation, yes sir I could. See, this is why I took that client liaison position. Longer hours, more interaction with people and sometimes we have to travel outside the office to other offices in Melbourne: everyone said I was crazy. … [Expand…]

I Am Definitely On Board with Antennas

Antennas now. Really. Eh, I can work with it. Streaming and the internet and whatever might be pretty good, but I do love a bit of regular, home-grown, scheduled television. I never once downloaded ‘Fantasy’, I’ll have you know. I waited until it was on TV and watched it with the rest of the 50-year-olds … [Expand…]

We’ll Just NOT Have Tinted Windows

This has become a daily occurrence. I come to my desk, I look at my email and it’s one from the bosses, saying that a client will no longer be working with us. But good news, we’ve picked up some other deadbeat company! Yeah, until Lawrence Corp steals THEM from us as well, and we … [Expand…]

I’m Totally Passionate About Welding or Whatever

Now I’m in trouble. The boss seems to have finally noticed that a few of us are…well, ‘low-energy’. Low-energy means less productivity, so we’re having a motivational seminar, with a twist. Ordinary motivational seminars I can handle; we have them every now and then, and I know exactly where to sit to avoid audience participation. … [Expand…]

See, I Actually Do Some Work Around Here

The way I see it, I’m getting paid to fill a seat, and maybe do some good deeds. I’m such a good person, really. The whole time I’ve worked here I haven’t done a shred of work, to the point where I’ve turned looking like I’m working into an art form. Not that the boss … [Expand…]

Property Seminars Are Nice, I Guess

The managers are being nice, and that means something is up. I can’t say what it is, because I really don’t have a precedent to go on, but…it’s got to be something. They don’t just get all snuggly out of nowhere…they probably want to announce a company-wide weekend working policy, and they’re trying to soften … [Expand…]

Lighting that ISN’T Terrible

Funny how we’re now dealing with lighting, when the stuff we have in the office is total trash. It’s that really bland, white light that just bleeds through the ceiling and makes everyone look terrible. Woe betide anyone with skin imperfections, because you’re going to look even worse working in this office. I know that … [Expand…]

Funny Plumbing Books

One thing I don’t often see talked about in coffee table books is plumbing. Funny animals and beautiful scenery? They’re all very nice, but they’ve been done time and time again, and it’s time for something fresh. I happen to know a particularly hilarious cartoonist who specialises in all things to do with plumbing, and … [Expand…]

Just Prune That Bonsai…

Calm your mind, says the therapist. Well, I’m sitting here right now and typing out my thoughts in an ATTEMPT to stay calm. How’s it working, did someone say? Fine. It’s…working…fine…sorry, got distracted there by the sound of my grinding teeth. And I was doing so well. Then we had to have staff meeting where … [Expand…]

Business Connections and Arch Supports

The best thing about working here is that you get to know all kinds of interesting people. I managed to land myself a job in sales, and when you change industries as much as we do, that means you touch base with practically every industry in Melbourne. Seriously, just name a field. I’ve probably had … [Expand…]